Funky Closet Freak Blues - Lead Sheet, Page 1 of 2: I work five days a week as a pro alcoholic. I come home run down and so melancholic, so hung-up and hung-over, honey, I can hardly speak. But then I doff my hat and I slip on my wig. And I do all those kinky things that hippies dig. My God! It's odd, but I love bein' a closet freak. (Which is not to say that I freak out on closets.) Oh, when I cannot cope, here at the end of my rope, I just take one more toke Of some fantastic and illegal smoke.


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